Your last thought, you know not from where it came. But, come it did. And so it goes for your next thought, and the one after that. Like a river flowing, they sweep you along and direct you from one point of your life to the next. You believe that they define you; indeed they guide your actions, and others define you by those actions, so in a way, you're correct.
Most of the time, anyway.
There are times when it occurs to you that rather than be guided by your thoughts, it's better for you to actively guide them. Studying, learning, putting ideas into practice... these activities make it much more likely that you'll make optimal decisions in certain contexts.
This is the closest thing we have to free will. You can decide now to act in such a way that at some point in the future you'll most likely arrive at a place that is closer to your desired destination than one you would've arrived at had you not decided to guide your thoughts at all.
In a short-enough time frame, free will all but disappears. In a long-enough one, free will is a lot less fuzzy.
Those dark thoughts you've been having, you wish they'd go away, and sometimes they do. But, they come back eventually. Is it a chemical problem? An environmental one? Is it something else? Shouldn't you at least try to know the answer?
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